![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Give me a character/pairing and I will write you the following AU/ARs:
01. Canon Swerve
02. Dystopian
03. Cyberpunk
04. Steampunk
05. …In SPACE!!
06. Genderswap/Always A ______
07. Urban Fantasy
08. Robots
09. Kidfic
10. Matriarchy
Akemi Homura
01. Canon Swerve
Homura ignores Kyuubey - that the Incubator is here at all means that the witch is near. If Madoka follows, it will be a good chance for her to see exactly how dangerous witches are. Perhaps then she can be convinced that being a magic girl is not good for her.
Halfway through fighting the witch, Tomoe Mami joins in. Homura works around her attacks and supports her. It's easy - how many times has Homura supported Tomoe-san before?
Handing the grief seed to Tomoe clinches the deal. Homura watches as Tomoe's face lights up at the thought of a new ally. At this time, Tomoe is still sore over the loss of Kyouko; surely Homura will be welcome.
Oh! Are we too late? Kyuubey asks as he trots in. Homura clenches her fists as he's followed by Madoka and Miki Sayaka. Madoka stops completely when she sees Homura. Miki makes a comment about cosplay.
"No, you're just in time." Tomoe has always been too nice to Kyuubey. This time is no exception. "You can have the grief seed after Akemi is done with it." Tomoe holds out the grief seed to Homura.
It's nice to see the two of you getting along. I brought these girls to help you too! says Kyuubey.
As Tomoe grows fairly buoyant with pleasure, Homura thinks that this timeline will be more complicated than she expected.
02. Dystopian
Perversely, being a magic girl makes it easier to survive in these dark ages. Homura's enhanced body can stand up to more abuse, so she hands most of her food to Madoka instead. Homura herself survives on a diet of grief seeds. Witches are plentiful in this morose environment, growing fat on the general despair that has settled over everyone.
"Do you ever think we'll break free of the Imperial Condescence?" Madoka asks one day. Her eyes are red-rimmed, and Homura knows that Kyuubey has been speaking to her each time Homura is out hunting witches.
"Yes," Homura tells her. "And we will defeat her with our own hands, not wishes."
03. Cyberpunk
Homura doesn't know who designed the witch game space, but it's always disconcerting to be immersed in one. Even though she knows that Sayaka is behind the controls of this witch, it doesn't stop it from being a chilling experience. The music swells in the empty concert space and reverberates down Homura's biolinks.
Kyouko doesn't seem to be bothered. "C'mon," she says, still munching on the candy she bought in-game. "We've got to route Sayaka out of her space and get our XP!"
"And the grief seed," Homura reminds her, before checking her weapons.
04. Steampunk
"Can we get one of these???"
Homura sighed. She really shouldn't have brought Kyouko with her when she was restocking her shield for Walpurgisnacht. While Kyouko did indeed have ideas about what weapons Homura should use against Walpurgisnacht, those ideas were not very practical.
"The largest item I've ever put in my shield was a jet propelled bomb," Homura warned, as she walked over to Kyouko. From that position, she could crane her head a little less to take in the full scale of the airship.
"That just means you haven't tried right? Who knows it might actually work!"
"It's huge."
"The balloon's just made of helium isn't it? If it's too large, we can just let all the gas out!"
"Then it wouldn't be able to fly."
"Awww. Come ON. What's the harm of trying?"
That is how Homura ends up with an entire airship in her shield. She didn't even have to deflate it to put it in her shield. It never occured to her how strange her shield was before that.
05. …In SPACE!!
Homura looked from the alien to her pocket-top. "I don't see your species listed among the known aliens."
That's because only those with the potential to contract can see us.
"But if you followed us all the way to the stars, surely someone must have seen you at some point!" Homura tugged on her braids, unsettled. She had thought her alien encyclopedia was complete. How it could be that something so important was omitted?
"I'm sure lots of people have seen Kyuubey. I guess they didn't think they had to tell everyone that he exists," said Madoka.
06. Genderswap/Always A Boy
Homura had seen Madoka in some strange places, but this was the strangest place that he had ever seen her in.
"Kaname-san!" he called, as the storm blew hard around them. "Kaname-san! Didn't you hear the siren? We have to go to the shelter!"
He stepped back as she raised her head. She had clearly been crying, and he had just spotted the injured girl in her arms. No, the girl was dead.
"Homura-kun?" she asked. "Homura-kun, what are you doing here?"
07. Urban Fantasy
PMMM is already urban fantasy! Ooops!
08. Robots
Homura doesn't know what to do, when Madoka insists on going out into the storm to fight the witch. Robots are programmed to listen to their masters' commands, and Madoka had clearly commanded Homura to let her go.
But there's something in Homura's protocol that won't let her simply allow Madoka to go into clear danger. She's a robot assistant. When her master is in danger, surely there must be something that Homura can do to assist...?
That is why Homura follows Madoka out into the storm. She can calculate angles of attack, run scenarios on the probable outcomes, but she can't fight Madoka's war for her. She doesn't have the magic.
The alien that gave Madoka her powers loops around Homura's legs, flicker swift. Homura, it says, straight to Homura's core processor. You want to save Madoka, don't you?
"There must be something I can do."
If it's what your soul wishes for, I can do something for you.
"Artificial intelligence mechanisms don't posess souls."
I can give you the power you desire.
"Do it," says Homura, and Kyuubey reaches out.
What is your wish?
09. Kidfic
Kaname Madoka is utterly fearless.
She dashes at the older schoolgirls, taking up the standard battle cry of "Witches! Witches!" She's not even concerned that the older girls are just standing there laughing at her. Instead, she takes aim with her makeshift caterpult and shoots little paper pellets at them until they get bored.
When the girls have left, she offers Homura a grubby handkerchief. "Are you ok?"
Homura takes out the much cleaner handkerchief her mommy had given her that morning, and mops at the tears on her face. "I'm... ok."
Madoka beams at her. "You're really brave! But brave doesn't do anything for skinned knees. C'mon, I'll bring you to the doctor."
Homura doesn't explain that Homura's not as brave as Madoka is.
10. Matriarchy
For an heirness who is to inherit her mother's company, Madoka is incredibly down to earth. Whe Homura takes over her own family business, she only wishes she could only have so much grace and poise.
That makes the discovery that Madoka is one of the vaulted magic girls even more amazing.
"It isn't much," Madoka insists. "Mami is the veteran here."
"But how do you manage?"
"Girls are more powerful than you realise, Akemi-san."
Dave Strider
01. Canon Swerve
Dave stops being an Alpha Dave when his clone doesn't freak out and get off the Godtier bed early.
Between Godtier Dave and Davesprite, there are a few too many Daves around, so Dave sneaks out. Godtier Dave has better things to do, so Dave goes to help Jade with growing frogs.
That he gets shot to death in the process is just a thing that happens.
02. Dystopian
Trolls have ruled humans for as long as Dave remembers, but Bro taught him that he has rights, just as much as any other species. So when the teal-blood makes for his shades, Dave doesn't bow his head and let her take what she wants. Instead, he grabs her wrist. She's so thin that her bones bruise his hand in the process.
"Don't touch the shades," he tells her, in the common language.
She shows him an entire row of her shiny white teeth. He's sure she's got more rows hiding behind that, like an Earth shark. "The human has quite a personality, he he he," she says.
Dave stiffens for a blow that never comes. Instead, she twists her wrist out of his grasp. "Later, human," she says, and flits away, still bird like.
03. Cyberpunk
What Dave likes about Pesterchum is that it's a virtual world where you can sit and shoot the breeze with others. It's a little gritty, and some of the mods just don't make sense, but Dave likes it that way. Got to have some way to differentiate technology from the real world after all.
Like John next to him has a horrible overbite on his avatar. Dave didn't believe anyone could actually want to mod their avatar with buck teeth until he met John. Then again, John has sh1tty taste in movies so it's not surprising that it extends all the way to his taste in avatar choices.
(That's until he meets Jade, who actually makes an overbite look cute.)
04. Steampunk
The telegraph isn't for everyone, but Dave likes it. There's a certain rhythm to the clacking keys that reminds him of music. He's really fast at typing too, and makes very little mistakes, which puts him in high demand at his workplace.
Even with the workload, he takes some time to read the telegrams he sends out. It's little glimpses into people's lives, and yeah yeah so he's a voyeur. He likes to read the telegraph and personalise his sending style according to what he reads. He likes to think about it as a value added service.
That's how he stumbles upon this telegraph. Despite the cost per letter, the sender actually makes the space to talk about his favourite show. Dave checks the sender and recipient's names. It's a kid, sending off a missive to his father. The kid must really get along with his dad.
As a prize for piqueing Dave's curiousity, Dave deducts the cost of half the telegram from the kid. Then he sends off a telegram on the company dime. It reads as follows:
To: John Egbert
You sound like someone good to know STOP Im Dave Strider STOP
05. …In SPACE!!
Bro travels around multiple galaxies as he plays gigs and checks out the latest and coolest stuff to write up in his webzine. Dave gets to go with, checking out many cool and new planets along the way. His Pesterchum pals all think he's the greatest for having this gypsy lifestyle, and always ask him to tell stories about the planets he's been to.
Right now Dave is checking out this weird alien planet called Alternia. He had a good laugh about how the locals actually call themselves trolls, and of course he's told his friends all about their weird blood caste thing that they've got going on. Rose think it's barbaric, John thinks it sounds like something right out of his holovids. Dave is personally on Rose's side, but writes off John's enthusiasm as the views of someone who hasn't had the chance to step off planet Earth just yet.
He starts to think that maybe he should put his buddy straight when he ends up on the receiving side of one of those weird blood caste challenges.
06. Genderswap/Always A Girl
Daria Strider throws herself on the only part of the sofa that’s not covered in smuppets. “Ugh, it’s hot.”
Sis stops her ultimate gaming just long enough to straighten a smuppet or two. “Cut your hair then.”
“Didn’t I tell you I was trying out for the Guiness Book of Records? Gonna try and beat Rapunzel at this hair length thing.”
“And you didn’t think you ought to have cleared that with me? There ain’t enough room for your hair in this tiny place and someone’s gonna call the cops if you let it hang out of the window.”
“It’d be traffic stopping sight.”
“Damn straight.”
Daria really didn't want to get into this with Sis. “Alright, alright, I’ll cut it.”
Immediately a blade was brandished in Daria's face. “You need to borrow a sword?”
“Not nooooooooow!”
“Then quit your bellyaching. If it’s hot it’s your own darn fault.”
07. Urban Fantasy
"Well well, what have we here? If it ain't a human."
"Walking around all by his lonesome at night."
Dave glared at the talkative trio over his shades. "Eff this, I don't need to put up with this shit."
He meant to change the direction he was walking in, but one of the trio flashed in front of him. "What's this? You think you can mouth off and just walk off?" He flashed his fangs at Dave to try and intimidate him. Dave gave him a blank stare in return. "Who do you think you are?"
This time it was Dave who grinned. "I'm a Strider."
Better than any fang or claw, the vampires stood aside. Dave continued on his way. Being a Strider was good in a world where things went bump in the night. The name of a good family of Hunters went a long way
08. Robots
Dave doesn't know how his Bro got hold of this tech, but he has to say that it's really really good. Good enough to earn admiring stares from all the ladies when Dave walks in the streets. They're all appreciative of this coolkid honouring them with his good looks. Dave knows they're like to get to know him better, if they could.
He doesn't let them. Because once they discover that he's a man of metal and wires, that he's not actually human, they drop him like a hot potato. That's not the kind of dropping that Dave wants to be doing.
So he doesn't talk to them, and lets them think that he's not different from them at all.
09. Kidfic
Dave doesn't actually have any friends at school. He's too different - he has a Bro instead of a Dad, and he sure never had any Mom. Money's a bit tight too. Instead, he has his shades, a devil may care attitude and a smart mouth.
It's a good thing Bro teaches him how to be fast, because the only thing better than being a smart mouth coolkid is a smart mouth coolkid who never catches it because he can flash step and the bullies can't.
That's why Dave tells the truth as much as he can. He doesn't have any friends to please, and there's no way anyone can punish him for telling the truth. Sure, they might call him names, but Dave can handle it. (And when he can't, there's always his shades to front.)
10. Matriachy
It's hard being two men alone in a big city. Well-meaning neighbours try to tell Bro to get a good woman to take care of him, and sometimes recommend their own relatives. Bro turns them down - he's not interested, and he's brought Dave up all on his own. He doesn't need someone just as Dave is starting to stand on his own two feet.
Dave wants to be as awesome as his brother someday. He's no Rose, self-assured in the opportunities open to her, and he doesn't own an island like Jade, but he's sure he can do it. Bro's done it with a lot less and a kid to boot.
Homura/Kyouko
1.Canon Swerve
After they save Madoka from the witch that Sayaka has become, Homura turns to Kyouko. "You know that Sayaka cannot be saved. None of the witches that we have fought have turned back into a magic girl."
Kyouko actually clenches her fists. "How do you know that? This time could be different!"
"If we don't defeat Walpurgisnacht, bringing back Sayaka won't matter." Homura returns Kyouko's glare in full force, before she concedes. "We can try to save Sayaka, after Walpurgisnacht."
That's what gets Kyouko to follow Homura.
2.Dystopian
Homura doesn't know what to expect when she's hauled up to meet the High Priestess. So there's no reason why she should be so surprised by the young girl she sees, no older than herself.
"Yo," the High Priestess says, crunching into an apple. The juice runs down her chin, soaks into her robes that are as red as her hair. "What were you trying to do, messing up the place like that?"
The reference to the incident reminds Homura of her place as nothing else in this room has. She tilts her chin up. "Your religion is wrong."
Now Homura can see the age in her eyes, as the High Priestess takes her seriously for the first time. Something glows and then the tip of a spear is pressed against Homura's throat.
High Priestess Sakura Kyouko demands, "Do you dare repeat that again?"
"Your religion is wrong," Homura insists, and bares her throat, waiting for punishment.
3.Cyberpunk
In this particular match, Homura has been paired up with Sakura. She's not sure whether she likes it - technology is advanced enough that she can hear the perpetual munching that's going on in Sakura's pod. Madoka had warned her about that, but Madoka's sunny attitude made it sound like a matter of fact occurence, rather than the annoyance it actually was.
"What are you eating?" Homura asks, more out of horrid curiousity of what's causing so much crunching than actual interest in what Sakura was eating.
"Chips. Want some?"
"No need to waste your credits," Homura begins, but then comes the chime of the in-game generator. Sakura gives a light tug and a duplicated tube of chips pops out of her inventory.
"Not sure if they're as tasty as real-space chips, but hey, worth a try." Sakura pops the lid. "Here you go."
Homura takes a wafer of pixels, and lets her mods tell her what the in-game chips taste like.
04. Steampunk
Kyouko doesn't quite get machinery. She doesn't get how Homura can strip machines down to their parts, and put them together in new and interesting ways. She doesn't get how Homura can practise target practice with all the different kind of weapons men have made
But what Kyouko does get is people. So when Homura gets frustrated with her cogs and gears, enough to bang her fists on the table, Kyouko knows the best restaurants in town, or a performance they can watch, or even markets that sell everything from pretty pieces of jewellery to machine parts that make Homura's eyes shine.
She thinks that works out pretty well for the both of them.
Others to write:
Homura/Kyouko, Homura/Mami, Humanside Avengers (mostly Natasha and Clint, though Steve can come too)
1. genderswap
When Homura enters the office, the first thing he notices is how regal the woman seated behind it is. She sits behind her desk like a queen might sit at her throne. Then her gaze passes over Homura and he experiences for the first time what a subject of a royal court might feel - completely and utterly beneath this woman's attention.
At first Homura feels numb, and then his blood runs hot. He knows Oriko's intentions of sending him here are to make him feel completely and utterly insignificant to the Puelle Magis. He doesn't care. He'll prove himself to them all.
He lifts his chin, and walks straight into Kuchiki Byakuya's office.
2. bodyswap
Dave is not the largest of boys. For all his sinew and muscle that allows him to flash step, he's always been on the skinny side. While other boys might be Hulks, Dave's probably closer to a Black Widow.
Yet the first thing that strikes him upon waking up in Homura's body is that she's tiny. For all that she has legs that go on forever, she's short. He raises slender arms and marvels at the smallness of her hands.
He resists the urge to see if her palms fit nicely over her breasts. For one, they're not much of a handful to either of them. For another Homura is watching him. Probably. It's kind of hard to tell with the shades. Damn, she's just as good with the poker face.
Dave wiggles Homura's butt, just to be sure. Homura spoils the entire act by letting Dave's eyebrow twitch.
"Out of my body. Now."
"Welp let me check my sylladex, nope haven't got a clue of how we did that, probably have to go on a quest to acquire one but I don't have a walkthrough on how to get that booty." He pauses, and wriggles Homura's butt again. "I could settle for this."
3. drunk!fic
Homura had been sure that Kyouko's mantra of not wasting any food was going to get her into trouble someday.
She hadn't expected it to take this form: a wildly waving Kyouko singing Christian hymns at the top of her lungs about peace and brotherhood with all men. Homura only recognised the hymn because of all the frequent petitions to God, and not from the actual tune or lyrics.
On the next downswing Homura grabbed the bottle that Kyouko had been waving around. That, rather than Homura's repeated questions at various volumes, caught Kyouko's attention. "Hey Homura!" She sketched a bow that looked more like she had flopped over at the waist and then flopped back up. "Want some?"
Homura sniffed the neck. "Beer?"
" 'Twas supposed to be GINGER beer! At least, that's what I thought when I was nicking it."
"And it wasn't?"
"Men have no taste. Of all the drinks to choose..." Kyouko fell to muttering. Homura could pick out the phrases "tastes like piss", "still food", "gotta finish food" being repeated in various order. There was nothing to do but wait out Kyouko's intoxication. For now -
"Hey!" Kyouko yelled out when Homura turned away, bottle in hand. "You're not gonna drink that are you?"
"No."
"Then give it here." Despite being drunk, she got up pretty fast and made a credible grab at the bottle.
4. huddling for warmth
The only safe haven Homura could find was a waterlogged space under two walls leaning against each other. Despite that, Homura led Madoka into the space.
Madoka groaned as she finally got the chance to take her weight off her injured leg, falling into a seated position. Homura couldn't be as pleased, not when the act caused Madoka's wound to be submerged under the water.
"I can't lift my leg up," said Madoka, still colouring despite the circumstances.
"No, it's ok. I can still heal it." Homura knelt down to do just that. With her hands on Madoka's thigh, she could tell that the other girl was shivering. "Are you cold?"
At Madoka's nod, Homura shifted so that their sides were pressing together. She wasn't sure whether their waterlogged clothes were a problem, but she didn't have a choice.
Madoka wrapped her arm around Homura's waist. "You're cold too."
"It doesn't bother me."
Madoka pressed a kiss to Homura's brow. "When we are done, let's get Papa to make us hot chocolate, ok?"
"Alright," said Homura, already warmed by the simple kiss.
5. pretending to be married
"Gee, I never took you to be the sort to want white picket fences, I know the picture ain't complete but I think the 2.5 kids might been hard for my girlish figure."
The house was huge, and reminded Dave of Rose's house in uncomfortable ways. He preferred the closer walls and high grounds of an apartment. It was far more strategic for a zombie apocalypse than a huge house that probably wanted to eat you. (No, Dave wasn't missing home.)
Homura paused in carrying a huge box that should be far too heavy for her to cart around with that much ease. "I didn't pick the house, the Company did." Message trasmitted, she made her way into the bowel of the house, probably to be swallowed up by a corridor with a side of packing peanuts.
"You didn't even give me a formal ceremony and you're already giving me the cold shoulder? Are we trying to beat the splitsville record set by an ageing pop star? Though I'd have you know that I'm 100 times prettier than any pop star on the charts - "
Dave thought he was the master of ninja skills, but Homura had a way of getting under his radar, his defences, his goddamned skin as she sidled up to him, pressing her chest against his arm. She leaned up to whisper in his ear, "I'm afraid you don't have a say in the matter. Husband."
"Can we get on the marital bed right now I would like to consummate this marriage."
A pair of scissors smacked Dave in the chest, thankfully on the flat and non-pointy side. "If you want your marital bed you should unpack it yourself."
"Is that a yes to spousal getting to know each other better bonding Homuhomu? A start on the 2.5 kids?"
"No."
6. secretly a virgin
"Weren't you married?"
Homura didn't know that that would be the question that would break Byakuya's composure. He shifted from foot to foot, watching the action instead of Homura. Again, Homura was reminded that his previous wife was a sore topic for Byakuya even after all these years.
When he spoke again, his voice was softened by the tones of reminiscence. "I was. Hisana would have liked to consummate our marriage, but it wasn't safe - " His voice hardened on the last word, and when Byakuya looked up again he was again the Byakuya that Homura was more familiar with. Formal and curt, he summed up the situation as, "Hisana's condition was an overriding concern."
There had never been anyone else. Homura knew this, because of how long it had taken for Byakuya to accept that she could be someone else. "Would she be a concern now?" she wondered.
"No," said Byakuya, all doubt erased. "No, or I would not be here. Unless - ?"
"Madoka would not mind." Suddenly sitting on the bed seemed strange when Byakuya was waiting by the door. Homura stood and used the excuse to straighten her skirt. "I don't know what to do either," she confessed to her skirt.
Byakuya took the cue and closed the rest of the distance. He rubbed Homura's arm, and despite her long sleeves she had to suppress a shiver. "Shall we find out then?"
7. amnesia
When she wakes up, coughing up water in ridiculous amounts, the first thing the girl sees is black haired girl watching her with great surprise.
It makes the girl angry. "Hey," the girl says, voice raspy in between hacking up what feels like a whole ocean. "I'm trying to recover from drowning here. A little help?"
"You should be dead," says the black haired girl.
"Ya think?" This sets off a whole fresh wave of coughing. The black haired girl finally crouches down to help, but her thumps are far from useful. The girl has to wave her off.
... there has got to be a better way to refer to herself. Or the black haired girl.
"Who are you?" says the girl, because it's hella weird to ask about herself. She'll remember it, in time, maybe with a few hints.
"You don't remember me?"
"No, why should I remember a gun toting lolita?" the girl says, then has to check for guns. There's none on the black haired girl that she can see, although "lolita" does describe the purple and white outfit she is wearing. That is one hell of a glorified school uniform.
It also isn't entirely soaked through, which isn't what the girl can say about her own clothes. Man, why did she think wearing red was such a good idea... and how did she singe her damp clothes???
"What did Oktavia do to you?"
"Who's Oktavia?"
The black haired girl doesn't answer, just stands and stretches a hand out to the girl. "I'm Akemi Homura. Come with me if you want to know more."
Well, why the hell not? The girl takes Homura's hand.
8. cross-dressing
Madoka gripped the electric shaver tightly. "Isn't there some way of using magic to disguise ourselves?"
"It would take too long for us to figure out how to change our magic to let us do that. We have to be disguised as fresh recruits to listen to the general's talk and figure out where he has hidden the weapons we need." Homura, already in the military uniform, looked stern and unyielding when she turned to face Madoka, and not at all like the gentle girl that Madoka knew she was. "Or would you rather fight Walpurgisnacht without addition weapons?"
"No! It's just that... your beautiful hair!"
"It will grow back," said Homura. "After the effort we took to disguise ourselves as boys... this is just a little step."
Madoka gulped, and raised the shaver again.
9. forced to share a bed
The thing about Kyouko is that she steals covers.
This is what Homura learns when they end up planning against Walpurgisnacht late into the early morning. Kyouko had groaned when she stretched and ended up popping something in her back. "I'm gonna borrow your bed," she groused, and Homura was too tired to say no. So she changed and brushed her teeth and fell into her own bed, only to find that she couldn't reach for her covers.
She tugs. Kyouko rolls up like a pillbug. "Get your own," she mumbles.
Homura pulls harder. She gets a corner when Kyouko scrunches herself up into a tinier ball. Homura presses her back against Kyouko's and curls herself up around the small sliver of the blanket that she now owns.
Homura is so tired that she falls asleep like that, with Kyouko's bumpy backbone digging into the small of her back. When Homura wakes up again she is still curled up. It's Kyouko who is now splayed on her back. Homura is completely covered by the blankets that Kyouko has kicked off.
Homura goes back to sleep. She can rest this way too.
10. truth or dare
Truth
Madoka says, "Tell me why you are so cold, Homura."
Dare
Homura says, "I dare you not to become a magic girl."
Game
Neither of them will play by the rules.
11. historical AU
The man that the rest insist on referring to as "Homura's slave" isn't very good at household chores. But he knows weapons as well as Homura does. Her arrows are well balanced and tear through flesh like air. Her bow is always at just the right tautness. He makes a mess of a simple table, but cuts and polishes a new tack for her horse with workmanship that other Amazons envy.
She watches him sharpen her daggers, and has to ask, "Why do you do these so well?"
He doesn't look up from his work (she should make him look up, he's her slave) when he says, "It is what I know."
"I am killing your people."
He does look up then, but meets her eyes with a candour that belies his lower position. "I am aware of that too."
He goes back to sharpening her knives, and Homura gathers the dishes that she'll wash.
(Months later she will whisper to him, "They said you were making yourself the master, by leaving the housework to me. They told me that if I trusted you with my weapons you would sabotage me later."
He tightens his arm around her bare waist and mumbles into her hair, "Those fools. What do they know?")
12. accidental-baby-acquisition
Dave stares. "Don't tell me I'm the father."
"We had sex 5 timelines ago and this is our child from 3 years in the future," says Homura, without the emotion that the line deserved. She shifts the baby on her hip and Dave can feel both his heart and his jaw drop along with the movement. Is this what Bro felt when Dave came riding that meteor all those years ago?
She shifts the baby again and in exactly the same flat tone of voice says, "I was joking."
"Shit, Homura, you can't go cracking jokes like that. I'll flatline from a heart attack and you'd have to drop our not-baby to give me the kiss of life."
"No I wouldn't," Homura says with a mild tone that doesn't fool Dave. "I'll just timeturn until I find a universe where you'd actually be useful."
Dave lets one eyebrow rise above his shades. "What? Am not helpful enough yet."
"You're not offering to help me find the parents of this baby."
"Maybe I was going to sell it for some money. You ever thought of going into trafficking, Homu?"
"I refuse to trade in babies found in witch barriers," Homura replies. "Now are we taking this baby to the police station or shall we stand around and exchange more quips?"
"I'm all about the verbal parry," says Dave, but his feet are turning towards the nearest police station.
Tentatively
13. apocalypse fic (ByaHomu)
14. telepathy (DaveHomu)
15. crossovers! (MadoHomu)
16. High School / College (HomuKyou roommates fic)
17. Band AU
Britney Spears - Break the Ice
The dance floor was packed with people, which was why Homura was standing to one side. She didn't enjoy dancing, and she could watch people more easily that way.
It seemed Byakuya disagreed, for he suddenly appeared next to her. Homura did not analyse when she was able to read the variations in his carefully blank expressions, but it was clear to her.
"You are quite obvious over here," he said.
"I am out of the way of the dancers."
"Most people wouldn't believe that a pretty girl such as yourself would be standing alone."
As Homura was trying to figure out if he had given her a compliment, he held out his hand to her. "Shall we dance?"
Kalafina - Magia
Homura runs down the roads, empty of all except for the familiars. The sound of her machine guns is drowned out by the maniacal laughter of Walpurgisnacht.
Bullets only at this stage. She needs the explosives to deal with the actual witch - bullets are far too weak for a witch like this. She only hopes that her missiles have weakened the witch - she set up as many traps as she could before hand, but she already saved her strongest weapons for the opening attack. For the others, she has to get close enough to draw the witch in. If -
There's no times for ifs. It's only Homura right now.
So she keeps running. Keeps advancing towards the witch, as her pawns dance in front of Homura and try to keep her away. Her focus is on the distance from Walpurgisnacht, and the number of bullets left in her arsenal.
She has to make it to the witch. She has to do this alone. She has to keep running.
Maroon 5 - Moves like Jagger
The radio is playing a bouncy beat as they ride through the streets. It's just hot enough for the wind whipped up by their progress to be cooling, but not hot enough for that very wind to be annoying and hot and gritty.
"Where are you taking me?" she asks Renji.
"Somewhere with good food of course."
"I liked that dim sum place."
"We can't go back there, not after you shot up the place."
"If you didn't want me firing it, then you shouldn't have given me the shotgun."
"Yeah yeah, my bad. I'll keep it from you this time. You get into enough trouble without it anyway."
"Same. To. You~"
Quietdrive - Time After Time
Dave quirks an eyebrow at Homura. "What's with you pulling out a big red stop sign on time? Some large and nasty boogie man under the conference table?"
"Don't tell me you weren't tempted to simply skip the whole meeting."
"What makes you think I didn't? Time clone Dave right here, doing the sucky things that Alpha Dave doesn't want to do. That's what I'll do, if I were an Alpha Dave."
"I see that Alpha Dave didn't spare any of his sarcasm on his clones."
"Got more than enough sarcasm to go around. Want some?"
"Only if it helps me with being a team leader," says Homura. Her shoulders round slightly before straightening again. Dave pats the nearest shoulder.
Rihanna - Only Girl in the World
Dave knows he has good moves. He knows he has any number of admirers watching him right now, gasping at all his slick moves and sick beats. It just annoys him that he can't really be sure that the one person he wants watching him is really keeping her eyes on him. There are too many eyes on him, and he can't pick hers out of the crowd.
So he does a shimmy to where he last saw her, and manages to pace himself to step just in front of her at the end of a verse. She was watching him; good.
Her eyes widen slightly as he gets up her space. "Homu, I realised you might not have caught on, but this is a club."
"I saw when we came in," she said. "Your point?"
"So you come to a club to dance."
Homura's eyes widen even more as he pulls her into the middle of the crowd.
SNSD & Ke$ha - Run Devil Run
The song they were covering was different from their norm. It was a slinky, vengeful song - closer to something the Witches would sing. According to QB, it was to see if the voice waves generated by such a song would be useful for fighting entropy.
It was only a mic test, so there was no harm in that. Homura just hoped that it wouldn't end up being a stage filler piece - she could only imagine the accompanying costumes. The fans would lap it up of course, but that didn't mean she would be comfortable wearing them.
Their critics would also have a field day with the song. For one, Dave Strider would again poke fun about how the Sweeties didn't really have a style. In the past Homura wouldn't care, but now that they were in the same school she was exposed to his criticisms.
01. Canon Swerve
02. Dystopian
03. Cyberpunk
04. Steampunk
05. …In SPACE!!
06. Genderswap/Always A ______
07. Urban Fantasy
08. Robots
09. Kidfic
10. Matriarchy
Akemi Homura
01. Canon Swerve
Homura ignores Kyuubey - that the Incubator is here at all means that the witch is near. If Madoka follows, it will be a good chance for her to see exactly how dangerous witches are. Perhaps then she can be convinced that being a magic girl is not good for her.
Halfway through fighting the witch, Tomoe Mami joins in. Homura works around her attacks and supports her. It's easy - how many times has Homura supported Tomoe-san before?
Handing the grief seed to Tomoe clinches the deal. Homura watches as Tomoe's face lights up at the thought of a new ally. At this time, Tomoe is still sore over the loss of Kyouko; surely Homura will be welcome.
Oh! Are we too late? Kyuubey asks as he trots in. Homura clenches her fists as he's followed by Madoka and Miki Sayaka. Madoka stops completely when she sees Homura. Miki makes a comment about cosplay.
"No, you're just in time." Tomoe has always been too nice to Kyuubey. This time is no exception. "You can have the grief seed after Akemi is done with it." Tomoe holds out the grief seed to Homura.
It's nice to see the two of you getting along. I brought these girls to help you too! says Kyuubey.
As Tomoe grows fairly buoyant with pleasure, Homura thinks that this timeline will be more complicated than she expected.
02. Dystopian
Perversely, being a magic girl makes it easier to survive in these dark ages. Homura's enhanced body can stand up to more abuse, so she hands most of her food to Madoka instead. Homura herself survives on a diet of grief seeds. Witches are plentiful in this morose environment, growing fat on the general despair that has settled over everyone.
"Do you ever think we'll break free of the Imperial Condescence?" Madoka asks one day. Her eyes are red-rimmed, and Homura knows that Kyuubey has been speaking to her each time Homura is out hunting witches.
"Yes," Homura tells her. "And we will defeat her with our own hands, not wishes."
03. Cyberpunk
Homura doesn't know who designed the witch game space, but it's always disconcerting to be immersed in one. Even though she knows that Sayaka is behind the controls of this witch, it doesn't stop it from being a chilling experience. The music swells in the empty concert space and reverberates down Homura's biolinks.
Kyouko doesn't seem to be bothered. "C'mon," she says, still munching on the candy she bought in-game. "We've got to route Sayaka out of her space and get our XP!"
"And the grief seed," Homura reminds her, before checking her weapons.
04. Steampunk
"Can we get one of these???"
Homura sighed. She really shouldn't have brought Kyouko with her when she was restocking her shield for Walpurgisnacht. While Kyouko did indeed have ideas about what weapons Homura should use against Walpurgisnacht, those ideas were not very practical.
"The largest item I've ever put in my shield was a jet propelled bomb," Homura warned, as she walked over to Kyouko. From that position, she could crane her head a little less to take in the full scale of the airship.
"That just means you haven't tried right? Who knows it might actually work!"
"It's huge."
"The balloon's just made of helium isn't it? If it's too large, we can just let all the gas out!"
"Then it wouldn't be able to fly."
"Awww. Come ON. What's the harm of trying?"
That is how Homura ends up with an entire airship in her shield. She didn't even have to deflate it to put it in her shield. It never occured to her how strange her shield was before that.
05. …In SPACE!!
Homura looked from the alien to her pocket-top. "I don't see your species listed among the known aliens."
That's because only those with the potential to contract can see us.
"But if you followed us all the way to the stars, surely someone must have seen you at some point!" Homura tugged on her braids, unsettled. She had thought her alien encyclopedia was complete. How it could be that something so important was omitted?
"I'm sure lots of people have seen Kyuubey. I guess they didn't think they had to tell everyone that he exists," said Madoka.
06. Genderswap/Always A Boy
Homura had seen Madoka in some strange places, but this was the strangest place that he had ever seen her in.
"Kaname-san!" he called, as the storm blew hard around them. "Kaname-san! Didn't you hear the siren? We have to go to the shelter!"
He stepped back as she raised her head. She had clearly been crying, and he had just spotted the injured girl in her arms. No, the girl was dead.
"Homura-kun?" she asked. "Homura-kun, what are you doing here?"
07. Urban Fantasy
PMMM is already urban fantasy! Ooops!
08. Robots
Homura doesn't know what to do, when Madoka insists on going out into the storm to fight the witch. Robots are programmed to listen to their masters' commands, and Madoka had clearly commanded Homura to let her go.
But there's something in Homura's protocol that won't let her simply allow Madoka to go into clear danger. She's a robot assistant. When her master is in danger, surely there must be something that Homura can do to assist...?
That is why Homura follows Madoka out into the storm. She can calculate angles of attack, run scenarios on the probable outcomes, but she can't fight Madoka's war for her. She doesn't have the magic.
The alien that gave Madoka her powers loops around Homura's legs, flicker swift. Homura, it says, straight to Homura's core processor. You want to save Madoka, don't you?
"There must be something I can do."
If it's what your soul wishes for, I can do something for you.
"Artificial intelligence mechanisms don't posess souls."
I can give you the power you desire.
"Do it," says Homura, and Kyuubey reaches out.
What is your wish?
09. Kidfic
Kaname Madoka is utterly fearless.
She dashes at the older schoolgirls, taking up the standard battle cry of "Witches! Witches!" She's not even concerned that the older girls are just standing there laughing at her. Instead, she takes aim with her makeshift caterpult and shoots little paper pellets at them until they get bored.
When the girls have left, she offers Homura a grubby handkerchief. "Are you ok?"
Homura takes out the much cleaner handkerchief her mommy had given her that morning, and mops at the tears on her face. "I'm... ok."
Madoka beams at her. "You're really brave! But brave doesn't do anything for skinned knees. C'mon, I'll bring you to the doctor."
Homura doesn't explain that Homura's not as brave as Madoka is.
10. Matriarchy
For an heirness who is to inherit her mother's company, Madoka is incredibly down to earth. Whe Homura takes over her own family business, she only wishes she could only have so much grace and poise.
That makes the discovery that Madoka is one of the vaulted magic girls even more amazing.
"It isn't much," Madoka insists. "Mami is the veteran here."
"But how do you manage?"
"Girls are more powerful than you realise, Akemi-san."
Dave Strider
01. Canon Swerve
Dave stops being an Alpha Dave when his clone doesn't freak out and get off the Godtier bed early.
Between Godtier Dave and Davesprite, there are a few too many Daves around, so Dave sneaks out. Godtier Dave has better things to do, so Dave goes to help Jade with growing frogs.
That he gets shot to death in the process is just a thing that happens.
02. Dystopian
Trolls have ruled humans for as long as Dave remembers, but Bro taught him that he has rights, just as much as any other species. So when the teal-blood makes for his shades, Dave doesn't bow his head and let her take what she wants. Instead, he grabs her wrist. She's so thin that her bones bruise his hand in the process.
"Don't touch the shades," he tells her, in the common language.
She shows him an entire row of her shiny white teeth. He's sure she's got more rows hiding behind that, like an Earth shark. "The human has quite a personality, he he he," she says.
Dave stiffens for a blow that never comes. Instead, she twists her wrist out of his grasp. "Later, human," she says, and flits away, still bird like.
03. Cyberpunk
What Dave likes about Pesterchum is that it's a virtual world where you can sit and shoot the breeze with others. It's a little gritty, and some of the mods just don't make sense, but Dave likes it that way. Got to have some way to differentiate technology from the real world after all.
Like John next to him has a horrible overbite on his avatar. Dave didn't believe anyone could actually want to mod their avatar with buck teeth until he met John. Then again, John has sh1tty taste in movies so it's not surprising that it extends all the way to his taste in avatar choices.
(That's until he meets Jade, who actually makes an overbite look cute.)
04. Steampunk
The telegraph isn't for everyone, but Dave likes it. There's a certain rhythm to the clacking keys that reminds him of music. He's really fast at typing too, and makes very little mistakes, which puts him in high demand at his workplace.
Even with the workload, he takes some time to read the telegrams he sends out. It's little glimpses into people's lives, and yeah yeah so he's a voyeur. He likes to read the telegraph and personalise his sending style according to what he reads. He likes to think about it as a value added service.
That's how he stumbles upon this telegraph. Despite the cost per letter, the sender actually makes the space to talk about his favourite show. Dave checks the sender and recipient's names. It's a kid, sending off a missive to his father. The kid must really get along with his dad.
As a prize for piqueing Dave's curiousity, Dave deducts the cost of half the telegram from the kid. Then he sends off a telegram on the company dime. It reads as follows:
To: John Egbert
You sound like someone good to know STOP Im Dave Strider STOP
05. …In SPACE!!
Bro travels around multiple galaxies as he plays gigs and checks out the latest and coolest stuff to write up in his webzine. Dave gets to go with, checking out many cool and new planets along the way. His Pesterchum pals all think he's the greatest for having this gypsy lifestyle, and always ask him to tell stories about the planets he's been to.
Right now Dave is checking out this weird alien planet called Alternia. He had a good laugh about how the locals actually call themselves trolls, and of course he's told his friends all about their weird blood caste thing that they've got going on. Rose think it's barbaric, John thinks it sounds like something right out of his holovids. Dave is personally on Rose's side, but writes off John's enthusiasm as the views of someone who hasn't had the chance to step off planet Earth just yet.
He starts to think that maybe he should put his buddy straight when he ends up on the receiving side of one of those weird blood caste challenges.
06. Genderswap/Always A Girl
Daria Strider throws herself on the only part of the sofa that’s not covered in smuppets. “Ugh, it’s hot.”
Sis stops her ultimate gaming just long enough to straighten a smuppet or two. “Cut your hair then.”
“Didn’t I tell you I was trying out for the Guiness Book of Records? Gonna try and beat Rapunzel at this hair length thing.”
“And you didn’t think you ought to have cleared that with me? There ain’t enough room for your hair in this tiny place and someone’s gonna call the cops if you let it hang out of the window.”
“It’d be traffic stopping sight.”
“Damn straight.”
Daria really didn't want to get into this with Sis. “Alright, alright, I’ll cut it.”
Immediately a blade was brandished in Daria's face. “You need to borrow a sword?”
“Not nooooooooow!”
“Then quit your bellyaching. If it’s hot it’s your own darn fault.”
07. Urban Fantasy
"Well well, what have we here? If it ain't a human."
"Walking around all by his lonesome at night."
Dave glared at the talkative trio over his shades. "Eff this, I don't need to put up with this shit."
He meant to change the direction he was walking in, but one of the trio flashed in front of him. "What's this? You think you can mouth off and just walk off?" He flashed his fangs at Dave to try and intimidate him. Dave gave him a blank stare in return. "Who do you think you are?"
This time it was Dave who grinned. "I'm a Strider."
Better than any fang or claw, the vampires stood aside. Dave continued on his way. Being a Strider was good in a world where things went bump in the night. The name of a good family of Hunters went a long way
08. Robots
Dave doesn't know how his Bro got hold of this tech, but he has to say that it's really really good. Good enough to earn admiring stares from all the ladies when Dave walks in the streets. They're all appreciative of this coolkid honouring them with his good looks. Dave knows they're like to get to know him better, if they could.
He doesn't let them. Because once they discover that he's a man of metal and wires, that he's not actually human, they drop him like a hot potato. That's not the kind of dropping that Dave wants to be doing.
So he doesn't talk to them, and lets them think that he's not different from them at all.
09. Kidfic
Dave doesn't actually have any friends at school. He's too different - he has a Bro instead of a Dad, and he sure never had any Mom. Money's a bit tight too. Instead, he has his shades, a devil may care attitude and a smart mouth.
It's a good thing Bro teaches him how to be fast, because the only thing better than being a smart mouth coolkid is a smart mouth coolkid who never catches it because he can flash step and the bullies can't.
That's why Dave tells the truth as much as he can. He doesn't have any friends to please, and there's no way anyone can punish him for telling the truth. Sure, they might call him names, but Dave can handle it. (And when he can't, there's always his shades to front.)
10. Matriachy
It's hard being two men alone in a big city. Well-meaning neighbours try to tell Bro to get a good woman to take care of him, and sometimes recommend their own relatives. Bro turns them down - he's not interested, and he's brought Dave up all on his own. He doesn't need someone just as Dave is starting to stand on his own two feet.
Dave wants to be as awesome as his brother someday. He's no Rose, self-assured in the opportunities open to her, and he doesn't own an island like Jade, but he's sure he can do it. Bro's done it with a lot less and a kid to boot.
Homura/Kyouko
1.Canon Swerve
After they save Madoka from the witch that Sayaka has become, Homura turns to Kyouko. "You know that Sayaka cannot be saved. None of the witches that we have fought have turned back into a magic girl."
Kyouko actually clenches her fists. "How do you know that? This time could be different!"
"If we don't defeat Walpurgisnacht, bringing back Sayaka won't matter." Homura returns Kyouko's glare in full force, before she concedes. "We can try to save Sayaka, after Walpurgisnacht."
That's what gets Kyouko to follow Homura.
2.Dystopian
Homura doesn't know what to expect when she's hauled up to meet the High Priestess. So there's no reason why she should be so surprised by the young girl she sees, no older than herself.
"Yo," the High Priestess says, crunching into an apple. The juice runs down her chin, soaks into her robes that are as red as her hair. "What were you trying to do, messing up the place like that?"
The reference to the incident reminds Homura of her place as nothing else in this room has. She tilts her chin up. "Your religion is wrong."
Now Homura can see the age in her eyes, as the High Priestess takes her seriously for the first time. Something glows and then the tip of a spear is pressed against Homura's throat.
High Priestess Sakura Kyouko demands, "Do you dare repeat that again?"
"Your religion is wrong," Homura insists, and bares her throat, waiting for punishment.
3.Cyberpunk
In this particular match, Homura has been paired up with Sakura. She's not sure whether she likes it - technology is advanced enough that she can hear the perpetual munching that's going on in Sakura's pod. Madoka had warned her about that, but Madoka's sunny attitude made it sound like a matter of fact occurence, rather than the annoyance it actually was.
"What are you eating?" Homura asks, more out of horrid curiousity of what's causing so much crunching than actual interest in what Sakura was eating.
"Chips. Want some?"
"No need to waste your credits," Homura begins, but then comes the chime of the in-game generator. Sakura gives a light tug and a duplicated tube of chips pops out of her inventory.
"Not sure if they're as tasty as real-space chips, but hey, worth a try." Sakura pops the lid. "Here you go."
Homura takes a wafer of pixels, and lets her mods tell her what the in-game chips taste like.
04. Steampunk
Kyouko doesn't quite get machinery. She doesn't get how Homura can strip machines down to their parts, and put them together in new and interesting ways. She doesn't get how Homura can practise target practice with all the different kind of weapons men have made
But what Kyouko does get is people. So when Homura gets frustrated with her cogs and gears, enough to bang her fists on the table, Kyouko knows the best restaurants in town, or a performance they can watch, or even markets that sell everything from pretty pieces of jewellery to machine parts that make Homura's eyes shine.
She thinks that works out pretty well for the both of them.
Others to write:
Homura/Kyouko, Homura/Mami, Humanside Avengers (mostly Natasha and Clint, though Steve can come too)
1. genderswap
When Homura enters the office, the first thing he notices is how regal the woman seated behind it is. She sits behind her desk like a queen might sit at her throne. Then her gaze passes over Homura and he experiences for the first time what a subject of a royal court might feel - completely and utterly beneath this woman's attention.
At first Homura feels numb, and then his blood runs hot. He knows Oriko's intentions of sending him here are to make him feel completely and utterly insignificant to the Puelle Magis. He doesn't care. He'll prove himself to them all.
He lifts his chin, and walks straight into Kuchiki Byakuya's office.
2. bodyswap
Dave is not the largest of boys. For all his sinew and muscle that allows him to flash step, he's always been on the skinny side. While other boys might be Hulks, Dave's probably closer to a Black Widow.
Yet the first thing that strikes him upon waking up in Homura's body is that she's tiny. For all that she has legs that go on forever, she's short. He raises slender arms and marvels at the smallness of her hands.
He resists the urge to see if her palms fit nicely over her breasts. For one, they're not much of a handful to either of them. For another Homura is watching him. Probably. It's kind of hard to tell with the shades. Damn, she's just as good with the poker face.
Dave wiggles Homura's butt, just to be sure. Homura spoils the entire act by letting Dave's eyebrow twitch.
"Out of my body. Now."
"Welp let me check my sylladex, nope haven't got a clue of how we did that, probably have to go on a quest to acquire one but I don't have a walkthrough on how to get that booty." He pauses, and wriggles Homura's butt again. "I could settle for this."
3. drunk!fic
Homura had been sure that Kyouko's mantra of not wasting any food was going to get her into trouble someday.
She hadn't expected it to take this form: a wildly waving Kyouko singing Christian hymns at the top of her lungs about peace and brotherhood with all men. Homura only recognised the hymn because of all the frequent petitions to God, and not from the actual tune or lyrics.
On the next downswing Homura grabbed the bottle that Kyouko had been waving around. That, rather than Homura's repeated questions at various volumes, caught Kyouko's attention. "Hey Homura!" She sketched a bow that looked more like she had flopped over at the waist and then flopped back up. "Want some?"
Homura sniffed the neck. "Beer?"
" 'Twas supposed to be GINGER beer! At least, that's what I thought when I was nicking it."
"And it wasn't?"
"Men have no taste. Of all the drinks to choose..." Kyouko fell to muttering. Homura could pick out the phrases "tastes like piss", "still food", "gotta finish food" being repeated in various order. There was nothing to do but wait out Kyouko's intoxication. For now -
"Hey!" Kyouko yelled out when Homura turned away, bottle in hand. "You're not gonna drink that are you?"
"No."
"Then give it here." Despite being drunk, she got up pretty fast and made a credible grab at the bottle.
4. huddling for warmth
The only safe haven Homura could find was a waterlogged space under two walls leaning against each other. Despite that, Homura led Madoka into the space.
Madoka groaned as she finally got the chance to take her weight off her injured leg, falling into a seated position. Homura couldn't be as pleased, not when the act caused Madoka's wound to be submerged under the water.
"I can't lift my leg up," said Madoka, still colouring despite the circumstances.
"No, it's ok. I can still heal it." Homura knelt down to do just that. With her hands on Madoka's thigh, she could tell that the other girl was shivering. "Are you cold?"
At Madoka's nod, Homura shifted so that their sides were pressing together. She wasn't sure whether their waterlogged clothes were a problem, but she didn't have a choice.
Madoka wrapped her arm around Homura's waist. "You're cold too."
"It doesn't bother me."
Madoka pressed a kiss to Homura's brow. "When we are done, let's get Papa to make us hot chocolate, ok?"
"Alright," said Homura, already warmed by the simple kiss.
5. pretending to be married
"Gee, I never took you to be the sort to want white picket fences, I know the picture ain't complete but I think the 2.5 kids might been hard for my girlish figure."
The house was huge, and reminded Dave of Rose's house in uncomfortable ways. He preferred the closer walls and high grounds of an apartment. It was far more strategic for a zombie apocalypse than a huge house that probably wanted to eat you. (No, Dave wasn't missing home.)
Homura paused in carrying a huge box that should be far too heavy for her to cart around with that much ease. "I didn't pick the house, the Company did." Message trasmitted, she made her way into the bowel of the house, probably to be swallowed up by a corridor with a side of packing peanuts.
"You didn't even give me a formal ceremony and you're already giving me the cold shoulder? Are we trying to beat the splitsville record set by an ageing pop star? Though I'd have you know that I'm 100 times prettier than any pop star on the charts - "
Dave thought he was the master of ninja skills, but Homura had a way of getting under his radar, his defences, his goddamned skin as she sidled up to him, pressing her chest against his arm. She leaned up to whisper in his ear, "I'm afraid you don't have a say in the matter. Husband."
"Can we get on the marital bed right now I would like to consummate this marriage."
A pair of scissors smacked Dave in the chest, thankfully on the flat and non-pointy side. "If you want your marital bed you should unpack it yourself."
"Is that a yes to spousal getting to know each other better bonding Homuhomu? A start on the 2.5 kids?"
"No."
6. secretly a virgin
"Weren't you married?"
Homura didn't know that that would be the question that would break Byakuya's composure. He shifted from foot to foot, watching the action instead of Homura. Again, Homura was reminded that his previous wife was a sore topic for Byakuya even after all these years.
When he spoke again, his voice was softened by the tones of reminiscence. "I was. Hisana would have liked to consummate our marriage, but it wasn't safe - " His voice hardened on the last word, and when Byakuya looked up again he was again the Byakuya that Homura was more familiar with. Formal and curt, he summed up the situation as, "Hisana's condition was an overriding concern."
There had never been anyone else. Homura knew this, because of how long it had taken for Byakuya to accept that she could be someone else. "Would she be a concern now?" she wondered.
"No," said Byakuya, all doubt erased. "No, or I would not be here. Unless - ?"
"Madoka would not mind." Suddenly sitting on the bed seemed strange when Byakuya was waiting by the door. Homura stood and used the excuse to straighten her skirt. "I don't know what to do either," she confessed to her skirt.
Byakuya took the cue and closed the rest of the distance. He rubbed Homura's arm, and despite her long sleeves she had to suppress a shiver. "Shall we find out then?"
7. amnesia
When she wakes up, coughing up water in ridiculous amounts, the first thing the girl sees is black haired girl watching her with great surprise.
It makes the girl angry. "Hey," the girl says, voice raspy in between hacking up what feels like a whole ocean. "I'm trying to recover from drowning here. A little help?"
"You should be dead," says the black haired girl.
"Ya think?" This sets off a whole fresh wave of coughing. The black haired girl finally crouches down to help, but her thumps are far from useful. The girl has to wave her off.
... there has got to be a better way to refer to herself. Or the black haired girl.
"Who are you?" says the girl, because it's hella weird to ask about herself. She'll remember it, in time, maybe with a few hints.
"You don't remember me?"
"No, why should I remember a gun toting lolita?" the girl says, then has to check for guns. There's none on the black haired girl that she can see, although "lolita" does describe the purple and white outfit she is wearing. That is one hell of a glorified school uniform.
It also isn't entirely soaked through, which isn't what the girl can say about her own clothes. Man, why did she think wearing red was such a good idea... and how did she singe her damp clothes???
"What did Oktavia do to you?"
"Who's Oktavia?"
The black haired girl doesn't answer, just stands and stretches a hand out to the girl. "I'm Akemi Homura. Come with me if you want to know more."
Well, why the hell not? The girl takes Homura's hand.
8. cross-dressing
Madoka gripped the electric shaver tightly. "Isn't there some way of using magic to disguise ourselves?"
"It would take too long for us to figure out how to change our magic to let us do that. We have to be disguised as fresh recruits to listen to the general's talk and figure out where he has hidden the weapons we need." Homura, already in the military uniform, looked stern and unyielding when she turned to face Madoka, and not at all like the gentle girl that Madoka knew she was. "Or would you rather fight Walpurgisnacht without addition weapons?"
"No! It's just that... your beautiful hair!"
"It will grow back," said Homura. "After the effort we took to disguise ourselves as boys... this is just a little step."
Madoka gulped, and raised the shaver again.
9. forced to share a bed
The thing about Kyouko is that she steals covers.
This is what Homura learns when they end up planning against Walpurgisnacht late into the early morning. Kyouko had groaned when she stretched and ended up popping something in her back. "I'm gonna borrow your bed," she groused, and Homura was too tired to say no. So she changed and brushed her teeth and fell into her own bed, only to find that she couldn't reach for her covers.
She tugs. Kyouko rolls up like a pillbug. "Get your own," she mumbles.
Homura pulls harder. She gets a corner when Kyouko scrunches herself up into a tinier ball. Homura presses her back against Kyouko's and curls herself up around the small sliver of the blanket that she now owns.
Homura is so tired that she falls asleep like that, with Kyouko's bumpy backbone digging into the small of her back. When Homura wakes up again she is still curled up. It's Kyouko who is now splayed on her back. Homura is completely covered by the blankets that Kyouko has kicked off.
Homura goes back to sleep. She can rest this way too.
10. truth or dare
Truth
Madoka says, "Tell me why you are so cold, Homura."
Dare
Homura says, "I dare you not to become a magic girl."
Game
Neither of them will play by the rules.
11. historical AU
The man that the rest insist on referring to as "Homura's slave" isn't very good at household chores. But he knows weapons as well as Homura does. Her arrows are well balanced and tear through flesh like air. Her bow is always at just the right tautness. He makes a mess of a simple table, but cuts and polishes a new tack for her horse with workmanship that other Amazons envy.
She watches him sharpen her daggers, and has to ask, "Why do you do these so well?"
He doesn't look up from his work (she should make him look up, he's her slave) when he says, "It is what I know."
"I am killing your people."
He does look up then, but meets her eyes with a candour that belies his lower position. "I am aware of that too."
He goes back to sharpening her knives, and Homura gathers the dishes that she'll wash.
(Months later she will whisper to him, "They said you were making yourself the master, by leaving the housework to me. They told me that if I trusted you with my weapons you would sabotage me later."
He tightens his arm around her bare waist and mumbles into her hair, "Those fools. What do they know?")
12. accidental-baby-acquisition
Dave stares. "Don't tell me I'm the father."
"We had sex 5 timelines ago and this is our child from 3 years in the future," says Homura, without the emotion that the line deserved. She shifts the baby on her hip and Dave can feel both his heart and his jaw drop along with the movement. Is this what Bro felt when Dave came riding that meteor all those years ago?
She shifts the baby again and in exactly the same flat tone of voice says, "I was joking."
"Shit, Homura, you can't go cracking jokes like that. I'll flatline from a heart attack and you'd have to drop our not-baby to give me the kiss of life."
"No I wouldn't," Homura says with a mild tone that doesn't fool Dave. "I'll just timeturn until I find a universe where you'd actually be useful."
Dave lets one eyebrow rise above his shades. "What? Am not helpful enough yet."
"You're not offering to help me find the parents of this baby."
"Maybe I was going to sell it for some money. You ever thought of going into trafficking, Homu?"
"I refuse to trade in babies found in witch barriers," Homura replies. "Now are we taking this baby to the police station or shall we stand around and exchange more quips?"
"I'm all about the verbal parry," says Dave, but his feet are turning towards the nearest police station.
Tentatively
13. apocalypse fic (ByaHomu)
14. telepathy (DaveHomu)
15. crossovers! (MadoHomu)
16. High School / College (HomuKyou roommates fic)
17. Band AU
Britney Spears - Break the Ice
The dance floor was packed with people, which was why Homura was standing to one side. She didn't enjoy dancing, and she could watch people more easily that way.
It seemed Byakuya disagreed, for he suddenly appeared next to her. Homura did not analyse when she was able to read the variations in his carefully blank expressions, but it was clear to her.
"You are quite obvious over here," he said.
"I am out of the way of the dancers."
"Most people wouldn't believe that a pretty girl such as yourself would be standing alone."
As Homura was trying to figure out if he had given her a compliment, he held out his hand to her. "Shall we dance?"
Kalafina - Magia
Homura runs down the roads, empty of all except for the familiars. The sound of her machine guns is drowned out by the maniacal laughter of Walpurgisnacht.
Bullets only at this stage. She needs the explosives to deal with the actual witch - bullets are far too weak for a witch like this. She only hopes that her missiles have weakened the witch - she set up as many traps as she could before hand, but she already saved her strongest weapons for the opening attack. For the others, she has to get close enough to draw the witch in. If -
There's no times for ifs. It's only Homura right now.
So she keeps running. Keeps advancing towards the witch, as her pawns dance in front of Homura and try to keep her away. Her focus is on the distance from Walpurgisnacht, and the number of bullets left in her arsenal.
She has to make it to the witch. She has to do this alone. She has to keep running.
Maroon 5 - Moves like Jagger
The radio is playing a bouncy beat as they ride through the streets. It's just hot enough for the wind whipped up by their progress to be cooling, but not hot enough for that very wind to be annoying and hot and gritty.
"Where are you taking me?" she asks Renji.
"Somewhere with good food of course."
"I liked that dim sum place."
"We can't go back there, not after you shot up the place."
"If you didn't want me firing it, then you shouldn't have given me the shotgun."
"Yeah yeah, my bad. I'll keep it from you this time. You get into enough trouble without it anyway."
"Same. To. You~"
Quietdrive - Time After Time
Dave quirks an eyebrow at Homura. "What's with you pulling out a big red stop sign on time? Some large and nasty boogie man under the conference table?"
"Don't tell me you weren't tempted to simply skip the whole meeting."
"What makes you think I didn't? Time clone Dave right here, doing the sucky things that Alpha Dave doesn't want to do. That's what I'll do, if I were an Alpha Dave."
"I see that Alpha Dave didn't spare any of his sarcasm on his clones."
"Got more than enough sarcasm to go around. Want some?"
"Only if it helps me with being a team leader," says Homura. Her shoulders round slightly before straightening again. Dave pats the nearest shoulder.
Rihanna - Only Girl in the World
Dave knows he has good moves. He knows he has any number of admirers watching him right now, gasping at all his slick moves and sick beats. It just annoys him that he can't really be sure that the one person he wants watching him is really keeping her eyes on him. There are too many eyes on him, and he can't pick hers out of the crowd.
So he does a shimmy to where he last saw her, and manages to pace himself to step just in front of her at the end of a verse. She was watching him; good.
Her eyes widen slightly as he gets up her space. "Homu, I realised you might not have caught on, but this is a club."
"I saw when we came in," she said. "Your point?"
"So you come to a club to dance."
Homura's eyes widen even more as he pulls her into the middle of the crowd.
SNSD & Ke$ha - Run Devil Run
The song they were covering was different from their norm. It was a slinky, vengeful song - closer to something the Witches would sing. According to QB, it was to see if the voice waves generated by such a song would be useful for fighting entropy.
It was only a mic test, so there was no harm in that. Homura just hoped that it wouldn't end up being a stage filler piece - she could only imagine the accompanying costumes. The fans would lap it up of course, but that didn't mean she would be comfortable wearing them.
Their critics would also have a field day with the song. For one, Dave Strider would again poke fun about how the Sweeties didn't really have a style. In the past Homura wouldn't care, but now that they were in the same school she was exposed to his criticisms.
Tags: