Comment Fic - v1

[fay_e]

Ichigo goes to house sit somewhere in Yokohama, gets crashed by Renji and Rukia who are 'keeping an eye on him'. Maybe they stay, maybe they don't - they're a little like cats that way.


Night after Rukia and Renji barge in

Ichigo voices his suspicion regarding one of the tenants

Ichigo has to deal with rabbit food

Some time after Rukia and Renji have been around for a while

Comments

[fay_e]

Ichigo opened the fridge. Renji's stupid orange juice was the first thing he saw, lying vertically across the top shelf and blocking Ichigo's view of what was behind it. With an impatient noise, he picked it up to put it back in the right place in the fridge door, only to find out it was empty. Right, another thing to restock. He tossed it behind him, not caring at the thud it made. He'd put it together with the trash. Later.

Obstacle aside, he peered into the fridge and gauged its contents. They had enough eggs, he decided, and they probably better finish off the grape juice. Rukia had asked for it on the last shopping trip, but hadn't touched it. Ichigo suspected that she only wanted it for the cute drawings, but knew better than to say so. Maybe he'd get Renji to distract her so that they could leave without grape juice this time.

Ichigo shifted the grape juice to the side to peer into the depths. He needn't have - behind the grape juice was the "stash" that had come with the house. He didn't know why his old man's friend needed red wine and sake AND a tub of port wine jelly. Renji had suggested finishing the drinks off, which Ichigo had vetoed but occasionally reconsidered when he was doing things like trying to squeeze 10 bottles of grape fruit juice into the fridge.

He was about to shift the grape fruit juice back when he noted something - two sake bottles had become one.

"Renji!" he hollered. There were suspicious thumping sounds from upstairs, but no reply. "Renji, I told you not to touch the sake!"

The thumping noises stopped long enough for Renji to yell back, "I didn't take it!"

"Yeah, I'd believe that if you weren't asking me about it every other day."

"You think I'd be dumb enough to take it when you tell me every other day that you'd pay back any sake I drank with my shades? I don't think so!"

Ichigo felt a headache growing along with the thumping that was coming from upstairs. "Then why is there only one bottle here?"

"How'd the hell I know? Ask Rukia!"

The thumping sounds ended with a suspiciously loud bang, which was followed by Rukia's voice. "Fool, the Kuchiki sake is far superior."

"Like you've even had any living world sake to compare!"

"It is a fact," Rukia replied petulantly, and burped.

[fay_e]

P.S: Contents of the fridge as taken from this thread -

eggs
ginger
anchovy paste, anchovies, wasabi paste, capers, green olives, pickles, basil paste
1/2 bottle of Chardonnay, 2 bottles of sake
parmesan, gouda, extra old cheddar
pesto, mayonnaise, Dijon mustard, horseradish, maple syrup
okonomi sauce, koshi an, Pocari Sweat, shiro miso, Sangaria Melon Soda, matcha
shrimp sauce, oyster sauce, minced garlic
fried tofu
ground flax seeds
port wine jelly, pumpkin butter, marron chocolat
whipping cream, 2% milk, rice milk, goat's milk yogurt, cream cheese, half & half
homemade cashew "goat cheese"
chocolate truffles double sealed in refrigerator bags
tomato passata, salsa, pickled jalapenos
prunes
zucchini, thyme, mushrooms, grape tomatoes, strawberries, lemons, limes, asparagus
broccoli, basil, celery, bok choy, rosemary, parsley, green onions, mint, tarragon
baby carrots, spinach, 1/2 red pepper, avocados
Brita water, white grape juice, cranberry juice
bacon
take-out flat rice noodles with beef (my fave)

[fay_e]

Based on the fridge list above:

Whoever owned this house was a rabbit.

Ichigo came to this conclusion when he peered into the fridge and saw an entire row of green leafy stuff. He checked the meat section of the fridge, but didn't see any meat at all.

Or it was the other way around and the owner of the house only ate meat. That would explain why it was just the veggies that were left.

Unaware of Ichigo's dilemma, Rukia peered around his arm at the fridge's content. "Oo, cucumber!" She snagged it off the shelf before Ichigo could stop her and took a large mouthful of dark green. Contented chewing soon gave way to a confused expression. "This isn't cucumber."

"Really?" He took the vegetable from Rukia and was surprised by how dry it was. Had it been in the fridge too long? He chomped on the bitten off end, and immediately realised what was wrong. "Ah. This is what Yuzu calls a zucchini."

"I don't want it anymore," said Rukia. "Is there actually anything to eat?"

He should probably fry the zucchini. He'd seen Yuzu do that before. But then over Rukia's shoulder he spotted Renji and abruptly remembered that one time they went out to Rukongai and the number of plates left over after.

Ichigo threw the zucchini back in the fridge and slammed the door shut. "Let's go out."

"Where? I'm hungry," said Renji, not pausing between the two sentences.

"That's why we're going out stupid."

"Where?" Renji repeated.

"I dunno. Ramen?"

Rukia was still hovering by Ichigo's shoulder even though he'd shut the fridge door. "That's not a where idiot."

"Fine, a Ramen restaurant your Highness. Should I get your coat for you?"

"Yes, do," said Rukia. Thankfully she was too short to see the eye roll Renji and Ichigo shared over her head.